The Blue Cross
From <The Innocence of Father Brown>
Between the silver ribbon of morning and the green glittering ribbon
of sea, the boat touched Harwich and let loose a swarm of folk like flies,
among whom the man we must follow was by no means conspicuous - nor wished
to be. There was nothing notable about him, except a slight contrast between
the holiday gaiety of his clothes and the official gravity of his face.
His clothes included a slight, pale grey jacket, a white waistcoat, and
a silver straw hat with a grey-blue ribbon. His lean face was dark by
contrast, and ended in a curt black beard that looked Spanish and suggested
an Elizabethan ruff. He was smoking a cigarette with the seriousness of
an idler. There was nothing about him to indicate the fact that the grey
jacket covered a loaded revolver, that the white waistcoat covered a police
card, or that the straw hat covered one of the most powerful intellects
in
Europe. For this was Valentin himself, the head of the Paris police and
the most famous investigator of the world; and he was coming from Brussels
to London to make the greatest arrest of the century.
Flambeau was in England. The police of three countries had tracked the
great criminal at last from Ghent to Brussels, from Brussels to the Hook
of Holland; and it was conjectured that he would take some advantage of
the unfamiliarity and confusion of the Eucharistic Congress, then taking
place in London. Probably he would travel as some minor clerk or secretary
connected with it; but, of course, Valentin could not be certain; nobody
could be certain about Flambeau.
It is many years now since this colossus of crime suddenly ceased keeping
the world in a turmoil; and when he ceased, as they said after the death
of Roland, there was a great quiet upon the earth. But in his best days
(I mean, of course, his worst) Flambeau was a figure as statuesque and
international as the Kaiser. Almost every morning the daily paper announced
that he had escaped the consequences of one extraordinary crime by committing
another. He was a Gascon of gigantic stature and bodily daring; and the
wildest tales were told of his outbursts of athletic humour; how he turned
the <juge
d'instruction> upside down and stood him on his head, "to clear his
mind"; how he ran down the Rue de Rivoli with a policeman under each arm.
It is due to him to say that his fantastic physical strength was generally
employed in such bloodless though undignified scenes; his real crimes
were chiefly those of ingenious and wholesale robbery. But each of his
thefts was almost a new sin, and would make a story by itself. It was
he who ran the great Tyrolean Dairy Company in London, with no dairies,
no cows, no carts, no milk, but with some thousand subscribers. These
he served by the simple operation of
moving the little milk cans outside people's doors to the doors of his
own customers. It was he who had kept up an unaccountable and close correspondence
with a young lady whose whole letter-bag was intercepted, by the extraordinary
trick of photographing his messages infinitesimally small upon the slides
of a microscope. A sweeping simplicity, however, marked many of his experiments.
It is said that he once repainted all the numbers in a street in the dead
of night merely to divert one traveller into a trap. It is quite certain
that he invented a portable pillar-box, which he put up at corners in
quiet
suburbs on the chance of strangers dropping postal orders into it. Lastly,
he was known to be a startling acrobat; despite his huge figure, he could
leap like a grasshopper and melt into the tree-tops like a monkey. Hence
the great Valentin, when he set out to find
Flambeau, was perfectly aware that his adventures would not end when
he had found him.
But how was he to find him? On this the great Valentin's ideas were still
in process of settlement.
There was one thing which Flambeau, with all his dexterity of disguise,
could not cover, and that was his singular height. If Valentin's quick
eye had caught a tall apple-woman, a tall grenadier, or even a tolerably
tall duchess, he might have arrested them on the spot. But all along his
train there was nobody that could be a disguised Flambeau, any more than
a cat could be a disguised giraffe. About the people on the boat he had
already satisfied himself; and the people picked up at Harwich or on the
journey limited themselves with certainty to six. There was a short railway
official travelling up to the terminus, three fairly short market gardeners
picked up two stations afterwards, one very short widow lady going up
from a small Essex town, and a very short Roman Catholic priest going
up from a small Essex village. When it came to the last case, Valentin
gave it up and almost laughed. The little priest was so much the essence
of those Eastern flats; he had a face as round and dull as a Norfolk dumpling;
he had eyes as empty as the North Sea; he had several brown paper parcels,
which he was quite incapable of collecting. The Eucharistic Congress had
doubtless sucked out of their local stagnation many such creatures, blind
and helpless, like moles disinterred. Valentin was a sceptic in the severe
style of France, and could have no love for priests. But he could have
pity for them, and this one might have provoked pity in anybody. He had
a large, shabby umbrella, which constantly fell on the floor. He did not
seem to know which was the right end of his return ticket. He explained
with a moon-calf simplicity to everybody in the carriage that he had to
be careful, because he had something made of real silver "with blue stones"
in one of his brown-paper parcels. His quaint blending of Essex flatness
with saintly simplicity continuously amused the Frenchman till the priest
arrived (somehow) at Tottenham with all his parcels, and came back for
his umbrella. When he did the last, Valentin even had the good nature
to warn him not to take care of the silver by telling
everybody about it. But to whomever he talked, Valentin kept his eye
open for someone else; he looked out steadily for anyone, rich or poor,
male or female, who was well up to six feet; for Flambeau was four inches
above it.
He alighted at Liverpool Street, however, quite conscientiously secure
that he had not missed the criminal so far. He then went to Scotland Yard
to regularise his position and arrange for help in case of need; he then
lit another cigarette and went for a long stroll in the streets of London.
As he was walking in the streets and squares beyond Victoria, he paused
suddenly and stood. It was a quaint, quiet square, very typical of London,
full of an accidental stillness. The tall, flat houses round looked at
once prosperous and uninhabited; the square of shrubbery in the centre
looked as deserted as a green Pacific islet. One of the four sides was
much higher than the rest, like a dais; and the line of this side was
broken by one of London's admirable accidents - a restaurant that looked
as if it had strayed from Soho. It was an unreasonably attractive object,
with dwarf plants in pots and long, striped blinds of lemon yellow and
white. It stood specially high above the street, and in the usual patchwork
way of London, a flight of steps from the street ran up to meet the front
door almost as a fire-escape might run up to a first-floor window. Valentin
stood and smoked in front of the yellow-white blinds and considered them
long.
The most incredible thing about miracles is that they happen. A few clouds
in heaven do come together into the staring shape of one human eye. A
tree does stand up in the andscape of a doubtful journey in the exact
and elaborate shape of a note of interrogation. I have seen both these
things myself within the last few days. Nelson does die in the instant
of victory; and a man named Williams does quite accidentally murder a
man named Williamson; it sounds like a sort of infanticide. In short,
there is in life an element of elfin coincidence which people reckoning
on the prosaic may perpetually miss. As it has been well expressed in
the paradox of Poe, wisdom should reckon on the unforeseen.
Aristide Valentin was unfathomably French; and the French intelligence
is intelligence specially and solely. He was not "a thinking machine";
for that is a brainless phrase of modern fatalism and materialism. A machine
only <is> a machine because it cannot
think. But he was a thinking man, and a plain man at the same time. All
his wonderful successes, that looked like conjuring, had been gained by
plodding logic, by clear and commonplace French thought. The French electrify
the world not by starting any paradox, they electrify it by carrying out
a truism. They carry a truism so far - as in
the French Revolution. But exactly because Valentin understood reason,
he understood the limits of reason. Only a man who knows nothing of motors
talks of motoring without petrol; only a man who knows nothing of reason
talks of reasoning without strong, undisputed first principles. Here he
had no strong first principles. Flambeau had been missed at Harwich; and
if he was in London at all, he might be anything from a tall tramp on
Wimbledon Common to a tall toast-master at the Hotel Metropole. In such
a naked state of nescience, Valentin had a view and a method of his own.
In such cases he reckoned on the unforeseen. In such cases, when he could
not follow the train of the reasonable, he coldly and carefully followed
the train of the unreasonable. Instead of going to the right places -
banks, police stations, rendezvous - he systematically went to the wrong
places; knocked at every empty house, turned down every <cul de sac>,
went up every lane blocked with rubbish, went round every crescent that
led him uselessly out of the way. He defended this crazy course quite
logically. He said that if one had a clue this was the worst way; but
if one had no clue at all it was the best, because there was just the
chance that any oddity that caught the eye of the pursuer might be the
same that had caught the eye of the pursued. Somewhere a man must begin,
and it had better be just where another man might stop. Something about
that flight of steps up to the shop, something about the quietude and
quaintness of the restaurant, roused all the detective's rare romantic
fancy and made him resolve to strike at random. He went up the steps,
and sitting down at a table by the window, asked for a cup of black coffee.
It was half-way through the morning, and he had not breakfasted; the
slight litter of other breakfasts stood about on the table to remind him
of his hunger; and adding a poached egg to his order, he proceeded musingly
to shake some white sugar into his coffee, thinking all the time about
Flambeau. He remembered how Flambeau had escaped, once by a pair of nail
scissors, and once by a house on fire; once by having to pay for an unstamped
letter, and once by getting people to look through a telescope at a comet
that might destroy the world. He thought his detective brain as good as
the criminal's, which was true. But he fully realised the disadvantage.
"The criminal is the creative artist; the detective only the critic,"
he said with a sour smile, and lifted his coffee cup to his lips slowly,
and put it down very quickly. He had put salt in it.
He looked at the vessel from which the silvery powder had come; it was
certainly a sugar-basin; as unmistakably meant for sugar as a champagne-bottle
for champagne. He wondered why they should keep salt in it. He looked
to see if there were any more orthodox vessels. Yes; there were two salt-cellars
quite full. Perhaps there was some
speciality in the condiment in the saltcellars. He tasted it; it was
sugar. Then he looked round at the restaurant with a refreshed air of
interest, to see if there were any other traces of that singular artistic
taste which puts the sugar in the salt-cellars and the salt in the
sugar-basin. Except for an odd splash of some dark fluid on one of the
white-papered walls, the whole place appeared neat, cheerful and ordinary.
He rang the bell for the waiter.
When that official hurried up, fuzzy-haired and somewhat blear-eyed at
that early hour, the detective (who was not without an appreciation of
the simpler forms of humour) asked him to taste the sugar and see if it
was up to the high reputation of the hotel. The result was that the waiter
yawned suddenly and woke up.
"Do you play this delicate joke on your customers every morning?" inquired
Valentin. "Does changing the salt and sugar never pall on you as a jest?"
The waiter, when this irony grew clearer, stammeringly assured him that
the establishment had certainly no such intention; it must be a most curious
mistake. He picked up the sugar-basin and looked at it; he picked up the
salt-cellar and looked at that, his face growing more and more bewildered.
At last he abruptly excused himself, and
hurrying away, returned in a few seconds with the proprietor. The proprietor
also examined the sugar-basin and then the salt-cellar; the proprietor
also looked bewildered.
Suddenly the waiter seemed to grow inarticulate with a rush of words.
"I rink," he stuttered eagerly, "I zink it is those two clergymen."'
"What two clergymen? "
"The two clergymen," said the waiter, "that threw soup at the wall."
"Threw soup at the wall?" repeated Valentin, feeling sure this must be
some singular Italian metaphor.
"Yes, yes," said the attendant excitedly, and pointed at the dark splash
on the white paper; "threw it over there on the wall."
Valentin looked his query at the proprietor, who came to his rescue with
fuller reports.
"Yes, sir," he said, "it's quite true, though I don't suppose it has
anything to do with the sugar and salt. Two clergymen came in and drank
soup here very early, as soon as the shutters were taken down. They were
both very quiet, respectable people; one of them paid the bill and went
out; the other, who seemed a slower coach altogether, was some minutes
longer getting his things together. But he went at last. Only, the instant
before he stepped into the street he deliberately picked up his cup, which
he had only half emptied, and threw the soup slap on the wall. I was in
the back room myself, and so was the waiter; so I could only rush out
in time to find the wall splashed and the shop empty. It don't do any
particular damage, but it was confounded cheek; and I tried to catch the
men in the street. They were too far off though; I only noticed they went
round the next
corner into Carstairs Street."
The detective was on his feet, hat settled and stick in hand. He had
already decided that in the universal darkness of his mind he could only
follow the first odd finger that pointed; and this finger was odd enough.
Paying his bill and clashing the glass doors behind him, he was soon swinging
round into the other street.
It was fortunate that even in such fevered moments his eye was cool and
quick. Something in a shop-front went by him like a mere flash; yet he
went back to look at it. The shop was a popular greengrocer and fruiterer's,
an array of goods set out in the open air and plainly ticketed with their
names and prices. the two most prominent compartments were two heaps,
of oranges and of nuts respectively. On the heap of nuts lay a scrap of
cardboard, on which was written in bold, blue chalk, "Best tangerine oranges,
two a penny." On the oranges was the equally clear and exact description,
"Finest Brazil nuts, 4d. a lb." M. Valentin looked at these two placards
and fancied
he had met this highly subtle form of humour before, and that somewhat
recently. He drew the attention of the red-faced fruiterer, who was looking
rather sullenly up and down the street, to this inaccuracy in his advertisements.
The fruiterer said nothing, but sharply put each card into its proper
place. The detective, leaning elegantly on his walking-cane, continued
to scrutinise the shop. At last he said, "Pray excuse my apparent irrelevance,
my good sir, but I should like to ask you a question in experimental psychology
and the association of ideas."
The red-faced shopman regarded him with an eye of menace; but he continued
gaily, swinging his cane, "Why," he pursued, "why are two tickets wrongly
placed in a greengrocer's shop like a shovel hat that has come to London
for a holiday? Or, in case I do not make myself clear, what is the mystical
association which connects the idea of nuts marked as oranges with the
idea of two clergymen, one tall and the other short?"
The eyes of the tradesman stood out of his head like a snail's; he really
seemed for an instant likely to fling himself upon the stranger. At last
he stammered angrily: "I don't know what you 'ave to do with it, but if
you're one of their friends, you can tell 'em from me that I'll knock
their silly 'cads off, parsons or no parsons, if they upset my apples
again."
"Indeed? " asked the detective, with great sympathy. "Did they upset
your apples?"
"One of 'em did," said the heated shopman; "rolled 'em all over the street.
I'd 'ave caught the fool but for havin' to pick 'em up."
"Which way did these parsons go?" asked Valentin.
"Up that second road on the left-hand side, and then across the square,"
said the other promptly.
"Thanks," replied Valentin, and vanished like a fairy. On the other side
of the second square he found a policeman, and said: Thus is urgent, constable;
have you seen two clergymen in shovel."
The policeman began to chuckle heavily. "I 'ave. sir; and if you arst
me, one of 'em was drunk. He stood in the middle of the road that bewildered
that - "
"Which way did they go?" snapped Valentin.
"They took one of them yellow buses over there," answered the man; "them
that go to Hampstead."
Valentin produced his official card and said very rapidly: Call up two
of your men to come with me in pursuit," and crossed the road with such
contagious energy that the ponderous policeman was moved to almost agile
obedience. In a minute and a half the French detective was joined on the
opposite pavement by an inspector and a man in
plain clothes.
"Well, sir," began the former, with smiling importance, "and what may
- ?"
Valentin pointed suddenly with his cane. "I'll tell you on the top of
that omnibus," he said, and was darting and dodging across the tangle
of the traffic. When all three sank panting on the top seats of the yellow
vehicle, the inspector said: "We could go four times as quick in a taxi."
"Quite true," replied their leader placidly, "if we only had an idea
of where we were going."
"Well, where <are> you going?" asked the other, staring.
Valentin smoked frowningly for a few seconds; then, removing his cigarette,
he said: "If you <know> what a man's doing, get in front of him;
but if you want to guess what he's doing, keep behind him. Stray when
he strays; stop when he stops; travel as slowly as he. Then you may see
what he saw and may act as he acted. All we can do is to
keep our eyes skinned for a queer thing."
"What sort of queer thing do you mean? " asked the inspector.
"Any sort of queer thing," answered Valentin, and relapsed into obstinate
silence.
The yellow omnibus crawled up the northern roads for what seemed like
hours on end; the great detective would not explain further, and perhaps
his assistants felt a silent and growing doubt of his errand. Perhaps,
also, they felt a silent and growing desire for lunch, for the hours crept
long past the normal luncheon hour, and the long roads of the North London
suburbs seemed to shoot out into length after length like an infernal
telescope. It was one of those journeys on which a man perpetually feels
that now at last he must have come to the end of the universe, and then
finds he has only come to the beginning of
Tufnell Park. London died away in draggled taverns and dreary scrubs,
and then was unaccountably born again in blazing high streets and blatant
hotels. It was like passing through thirteen separate vulgar cities all
just touching each other. But though the winter twilight was already threatening
the road ahead of them, the Parisian detective still sat silent and watchful,
eyeing the frontage of the streets that slid by on either side. By the
time they had left Camden Town behind, the policemen were nearly asleep;
at least, they gave something like a jump as Valentin leapt erect, struck
a hand on each man's shoulder,
and shouted to the driver to stop.
They tumbled down the steps into the road without realising why they
had been dislodged; when they looked round for enlightenment they found
Valentin triumphantly pointing his finger towards a window on the left
side of the road. It was a large window, forming part of the long facade
of a gilt and palatial public-house; it was the part reserved for respectable
dining, and labelled "Restaurant." This window, like all the rest along
the frontage of the hotel, was of frosted and figured glass; but in the
middle of it was a big, black smash, like a star in the ice.
"Our cue at last," cried Valentin, waving his stick; "the place with
the broken window."
"What window? What cue?" asked his principal assistant. "Why, what
proof is there that this has anything to do with - "
Valentin almost broke his bamboo stick with rage.
"Proof!" he cried. "Good God! the man is looking for proof' Why, of course,
the chances are twenty to one that it has <nothing> to do with them.
But what else can we do? Don't you see we must either follow one wild
possibility or else go home to bed?" He banged his way into the restaurant,
followed by his companions, and they were soon seated at a late luncheon
at a little table, and looked at the star of smashed glass from the inside
Not that it was very informative to them even then.
"Got your window broken, I see," said Valentin to the waiter as he paid
the bill.
"Yes, sir," answered the attendant, bending busily over the change, to
wretch vaientm silently added an enormous tip. The waiter straightened
himself with mild but unmistakable animation.
"Ah, yes, sir," he said. "Very odd thing, that, sir."
"Indeed? Tell us about it," said the detective with careless curiosity.
"Well, two gents in black came in," said the waiter, "two of those foreign
parsons that are running about. They had a cheap and quiet little lunch,
and one of them paid for it and went out The other was just going out
to join him when I looked at my change again and
found he'd paid me more than three times too much. 'Here,' I says to
the chap who was nearly out of the door, 'you've paid too much.' 'Oh,'
he says, very cool, 'have we?' 'Yes,' I says, and picks up the bill to
show him. Well, that was a knock-out."
"What do you mean?" asked his interlocutor.
"Well, I'd have sworn on seven Bibles that I'd put 4s. on that bill.
But now I saw I'd put 14s., as plain as paint."
"Well?" cried Valentin, moving slowly, but with burning eyes, "and then?"
"The parson at the door he says all serene, 'Sorry to confuse your accounts,
but it'll pay for the window.' 'What window?' I says. 'The one I'm going
to break,' he says, and smashed that blessed pane with his umbrella."
All three inquirers made an exclamation; and the inspector said under
his breath, "Are we after escaped lunatics?" The waiter went on with some
relish for the ridiculous story:
"I was so knocked silly for a second, I couldn't do anything. The man
marched out of the place and joined his friend just round the corner.
Then they went so quick up Bullock Street that I couldn't catch them,
though I ran round the bars to do it."
"Bullock Street," said the detective, and shot up that thoroughfare as
quickly as the strange couple he pursued.
Their journey now took them through bare brick ways like tunnels; streets
with few lights and even with few windows; streets that seemed built out
of the blank backs of everything and everywhere. Dusk was deepening, and
it was not easy even for the London policemen to guess in what exact direction
they were treading. The inspector, however, was pretty certain that they
would eventually strike some part of Hampstead Heath. Abruptly one bulging
gas-lit window broke the blue twilight like a bull's-eye lantern; and
Valentin stopped an instant before a little garish sweetstuff shop. After
an instant's hesitation he went in; he stood amid the gaudy colours of
the confectionery with entire gravity and bought thirteen chocolate cigars
with a certain care. He was clearly preparing an opening; but he did not
need one.
An angular, elderly young woman in the shop had regarded his elegant
appearance with a merely automatic inquiry; but when she saw the door
behind him blocked with the blue uniform of the inspector, her eyes seemed
to wake up.
"Oh," she said, "if you've come about that parcel, I've sent it off already."
"Parcel!" repeated Valentin; and it was his turn to look inquiring.
"I mean the parcel the gentleman left - the clergyman gentleman.
"For goodness' sake," said Valentin, leaning forward with his first real
confession of eagerness, "for Heaven's sake tell us what happened exactly."
"Well," said the woman a little doubtfully, "the clergymen came in about
half an hour ago and bought some peppermints and talked a bit, and then
went off towards the Heath. But a second after, one of them runs back
into the shop and says, 'Have I left a parcel?' Well, I looked everywhere
and couldn't see one; so he says, 'Never mind; but if it should turn up,
please post it to this address,' and he left me the address and a shilling
for my trouble. And sure enough, though I thought I'd looked everywhere,
I found he'd left a brown paper parcel, so I posted it to the place he
said. I can't remember the address now; it was somewhere in Westminster.
But as the thing seemed so important, I thought perhaps the police had
come about it."
"So they have," said Valentin shortly. "Is Hampstead Heath near here?
"
"Straight on for fifteen minutes," said the woman, "and you'll come right
out on the open." Valentin sprang out of the shop and began to run. The
other detectives followed him at a reluctant trot.
The street they threaded was so narrow and shut in by shadows that when
they came out unexpectedly into the void common and vast sky they were
startled to find the evening still so light and clear. A perfect dome
of peacock-green sank into gold amid the blackening trees and the dark
violet distances. The glowing green tint was just deep enough to pick
out in points of crystal one or two stars. All that was left of the daylight
lay in a golden glitter across the edge of Hampstead and that popular
hollow which is called the Vale of Health. The holiday makers who roam
this region had not wholly dispersed; a few couples sat shapelessly on
benches; and here and there a distant girl still shrieked in one of the
swings. The glory of heaven deepened and darkened around the sublime vulgarity
of man; and standing on the slope and looking across the valley, Valentin
beheld the thing which he sought.
Among the black and breaking groups in that distance was one especially
black which did not break - a group of two figures clerically clad. Though
they seemed as small as insects, Valentin could see that one of them was
much smaller than the other. Though the other had a student's stoop and
an inconspicuous manner, he could see that the man was well over six feet
high. He shut his teeth and went forward, whirling his stick impatiently.
By the time he had substantially diminished the distance and magnified
the two black figures as in a vast microscope, he had perceived something
else; something which startled him, and yet which he had somehow expected.
Whoever was the tall priest, there could be no doubt about the identity
of the short one. It was his friend of the Harwich train, the stumpy little
<curé> of Essex whom he had warned about his brown paper
parcels.
Now, so far as this went, everything fitted in finally and rationally
enough. Valentin had learned by his inquiries that morning that a Father
Brown from Essex was bringing up a silver cross with sapphires, a relic
of considerable value, to show some of the foreign
priests at the congress. This undoubtedly was the "silver with blue stones";
and Father Brown undoubtedly was the little greenhorn in the train. Now
there was nothing wonderful about the fact that what Valentin had found
out Flambeau had also found out; Flambeau found out everything. Also there
was nothing wonderful in the fact that
when Flambeau heard of a sapphire cross he should try to steal it; that
was the most natural thing in all natural history. And most certainly
there was nothing wonderful about the fact that Flambeau should have it
all his own way with such a silly sheep as the man with the umbrella and
the parcels. He was the sort of man whom anybody could lead on a string
to the North Pole; it was not surprising that an actor like Flambeau,
dressed as another priest, could lead him to Hampstead Heath. So far the
crime seemed clear enough; and while the detective pitied the priest for
his helplessness, he almost despised
Flambeau for condescending to so gullible a victim. But when Valentin
thought of all that had happened in between, of all that had led him to
his triumph, he racked his brains for the smallest rhyme or reason in
it. What had the stealing of a blue-and-silver cross from a
priest from Essex to do with chucking soup at wall paper? What had it
to do with calling nuts oranges, or with paying for windows first and
breaking them afterwards? He had come to the end of his chase; yet somehow
he had missed the middle of it. When he failed (which was seldom), he
had usually grasped the clue, but nevertheless missed the
criminal. Here he had grasped the criminal, but still he could not grasp
the clue.
The two figures that they followed were crawling like black flies across
the huge green contour of a hill. They were evidently sunk in conversation,
and perhaps did not notice where they were going; but they were certainly
going to the wilder and more silent heights of the Heath. As their pursuers
gained on them, the latter had to use the undignified attitudes of the
deer-stalker, to crouch behind clumps of trees and even to crawl prostrate
in deep grass. By these ungainly ingenuities the hunters even came close
enough to the quarry to hear the murmur of the discussion, but no word
could be distinguished except the word "reason" recurring frequently in
a high and almost
childish voice. Once over an abrupt dip of land and a dense tangle of
thickets, the detectives actually lost the two figures they were following.
They did not find the trail again for an agonising ten minutes, and then
it led round the brow of a great dome of hill
overlooking an amphitheatre of rich and desolate sunset scenery. Under
a tree in this commanding yet neglected spot was an old ramshackle wooden
seat. On this seat sat the two priests still in serious speech together.
The gorgeous green and gold still clung to the darkening horizon; but
the dome above was turning slowly from peacock-green to peacock-blue,
and the stars detached themselves more and more like solid jewels. Mutely
motioning to his followers, Valentin contrived to creep up behind the
big branching tree, and, standing there in deathly silence, heard the
words of the strange priests for the first time.
After he had listened for a minute and a half, he was gripped by a devilish
doubt. Perhaps he had dragged the two English policemen to the wastes
of a nocturnal heath on an errand no saner than seeking figs on its thistles.
For the two priests were talking exactly like
priests, piously, with learning and leisure, about the most aerial enigmas
of theology. The little Essex priest spoke the more simply, with his round
face turned to the strengthening stars; the other talked with his head
bowed, as if he were not even worthy to look at them.
But no more innocently clerical conversation could have been heard in
any white Italian cloister or black Spanish cathedral.
The first he heard was the tail of one of Father Brown's sentences, which
ended: ". . . what they really meant in the Middle Ages by the heavens
being incorruptible."
The taller priest nodded his bowed head and said:
"Ah, yes, these modern infidels appeal to their reason; but who can look
at those millions of worlds and not feel that there may well be wonderful
universes above us where reason is utterly unreasonable? "
"No," said the other priest; "reason is always reasonable, even in the
last limbo, in the lost borderland of things. I know that people charge
the Church with lowering reason, but it is just the other way. Alone on
earth, the Church makes reason really supreme Alone on earth, the Church
affirms that God himself is bound by reason."
The other priest raised his austere face to the spangled sky and said:
"Yet who knows if in that infinite universe - ?"
"Only infinite physically," said the little priest, turning sharply in
his seat, "not Infinite in the sense of escaping from the laws of truth."
Valentin behind his tree was tearing his fingernails with silent fury.
He seemed almost to hear the sniggers of the English detectives whom he
had brought so far on a fantastic guess only to listen to the metaphysical
gossip of two mild old parsons. In his impatience he lost the equally
elaborate answer of the tall cleric, and when he listened again it was
again Father Brown who was speaking:
"Reason and justice grip the remotest and the loneliest star. Look at
those stars. Don't they look as if they were single diamonds and sapphires?
Well, you can imagine any mad botany or geology you please. Think of forests
of adamant with leaves of brilliants. Think
the moon is a blue moon, a single elephantine sapphire. But don't fancy
that all that frantic astronomy would make the smallest difference to
the reason and justice of conduct. On plains of opal, under cliffs cut
out of pearl, you would still find a notice-board, 'Thou shalt not steal."'
Valentin was just in the act of rising from his rigid and crouching attitude
and creeping away as softly as might be, felled by the one great folly
of his life. But something in the very silence of the tall priest made
him stop until the latter spoke. When at last he did speak, he said simply,
his head bowed and his hands on his knees: "Well, I think that other worlds
may perhaps rise higher than our reason. The mystery of heaven is unfathomable,
and I for one can only bow my head."
Then, with brow yet bent and without changing by the faintest shade his
attitude or voice, he added: "Just hand over that sapphire cross of yours,
will you? We're all alone here, and I could pull you to pieces like a
straw doll."
The utterly unaltered voice and attitude added a strange violence to
that shocking change of speech. But the guarder of the relic only seemed
to turn his head by the smallest section of the compass. He seemed still
to have a somewhat foolish face turned to the stars. Perhaps he had not
understood. Or, perhaps, he had understood and
sat rigid with terror.
"Yes," said the tall priest, in the same low voice and in the same still
posture, "yes, I am Flambeau."
Then, after a pause, he said:"Come, will you give me that cross? "
"No," said the other, and the monosyllable had an odd sound.
Flambeau suddenly flung off all his pontifical pretensions. The great
robber leaned back in his seat and laughed low but long. "No," he cried,
"you won't give it me, you proud prelate. You won't give it me, you little
celibate simpleton. Shall I tell you why you
won't give it me? Because I've got it already in my own breast-pocket."
The small man from Essex turned what seemed to be a dazed face in the
dusk, and said, with the timid eagerness of "The Private Secretary": "Are
- are you sure? "
Flambeau yelled with delight. "Really, you're as good as a three-act
farce," he cried. "Yes, you turnip, I am quite sure. I had the sense to
make a duplicate of the right parcel, and now, my friend, you've got the
duplicate and I've got the jewels. An old dodge, Father Brown - a very
old dodge."
"Yes," said Father Brown, and passed his hand through his hair with the
same strange vagueness of manner. "Yes, I've heard of it before."
The colossus of crime leaned over to the little rustic priest with a
sort of sudden interest.
"<You> have heard of it?" he asked. "Where have you heard of it?"
"Well, I mustn't tell you his name, of course," said the little man simply.
"He was a penitent, you know. He had lived prosperously for about twenty
years entirely on duplicate brown paper parcels. And so, you see, when
I began to suspect you, I thought of this poor chap's way of doing it
at once."
Began to suspect me?" repeated the outlaw with increased intensity. "Did
you really have the gumption to suspect me just because I brought you
up to this bare part of the heath?"
"No, no," said Brown with an air of apology. "You see, I suspected you
when we first met. It's that little bulge up the sleeve where you people
have the spiked bracelet."
"How in Tartarus," cried Flambeau, "did you ever hear of the spiked bracelet?"
"Oh, one's little flock, you know!" said Father Brown, arching his eyebrows
rather blankly. "When I was a curate in Hartlepool, there were three of
them with spiked bracelets. So, as I suspected you from the first, don't
you see, I made sure that the cross should go safe, anyhow. I'm afraid
I watched you, you know. So at last I saw you change the parcels. Then,
don't you see, I changed them back again. And then I left the right one
behind."
"Left it behind?" repeated Flambeau, and for the first time there was
another note in his voice beside his triumph.
"Well, it was like this," said the little priest, speaking in the same
unaffected way. "I went back to that sweet-shop and asked if I'd left
a parcel, and gave them a particular address if it turned up Well, I knew
I hadn't; but when I went away again I did. So, in stead of running after
me with that valuable parcel, they have sent it flying to a friend of
mine in Westminster." Then he added rather sadly: "I learnt that, too,
from a poor fellow in Hartlepool He used to do it with handbags he stole
at railway stations, but he's in a monastery now. Oh, one gets to know,
you know," he added, rubbing his head again with the same sort of desperate
apology. "We can't help being priests. People come and tell us these things."
Flambeau tore a brown-paper parcel out of his inner pocket and rent it
in pieces. There was nothing but paper and sticks of lead inside it. He
sprang to his feet with a gigantic gesture, and cried: "I don't believe
you. I don't believe a bumpkin like you could manage
all that. I believe you've still got the stuff on you, and if you don't
give it up - why, we're all alone, and I'll take it by force!"
"No," said Father Brown simply, and stood up also, "you won't take it
by force. First, because I really haven't still got it. And, second, because
we are not alone."
Flambeau stopped in his stride forward.
"Behind that tree," said Father Brown, pointing, "are two strong policemen
and the greatest detective alive. How did they come here, do you ask?
Why, I brought them, of course! How did I do it? Why, I'll tell you if
you like! Lord bless you, we have to know twenty such things when we work
among the criminal classes! Well, I wasn't sure
you were a thief, and it would never do to make a scandal against one
of our own clergy. So I just tested you to see if anything would make
you show yourself. A man generally makes a small scene if he finds salt
in his coffee; if he doesn't, he has some reason for keeping quiet. I
changed the salt and sugar, and <you> kept quiet. A man generally
objects if his bill is three times too big. If he pays it, he has some
motive for passing unnoticed. I altered your bill, and <you> paid
it."
The world seemed waiting for Flambeau to leap like a tiger. But he was
held back as by a spell; he was stunned with the utmost curiosity.
"Well," went on Father Brown, with lumbering lucidity, "as you wouldn't
leave any tracks for the police, of course somebody had to. At every place
we went to, I took care to do something that would get us talked about
for the rest of the day. I didn't do much harm - a splashed wall, spilt
apples, a broken window; but I saved the cross, as the cross will always
be saved. It is at Westminster by now. I rather wonder you didn't stop
it with the Donkey's Whistle."
"With the what? " asked Flambeau.
"I'm glad you've never heard of it," said the priest, making a face.
"It's a foul thing. I'm sure you're too good a man for a Whistler. I couldn't
have countered it even with the Spots myself; I'm not strong enough in
the legs."
"What on earth are you talking about? " asked the other.
"Well, I did think you'd know the Spots," said Father Brown, agreeably
surprised. "Oh, you can't have gone so very wrong yet! "
"How in blazes do you know all these horrors?" cried Flambeau.
The shadow of a smile crossed the round, simple face of his clerical
opponent.
"Oh, by being a celibate simpleton, I suppose," he said. "Has it never
struck you that a man who does next to nothing but hear men's real sins
is not likely to be wholly unaware of human evil? But, as a matter of
fact, another part of my trade, too, made me sure you weren't a priest."
"What?" asked the thief, almost gaping.
"You attacked reason," said Father Brown. "It's bad theology."
And even as he turned away to collect his property, the three policemen
came out from under the twilight trees. Flambeau was an artist and a sportsman.
He stepped back and swept Valentin a great bow.
"Do not bow to me, <mon ami>," said Valentin with silver clearness.
"Let us both bow to our master."
And they both stood an instant uncovered while the little Essex priest
blinked about for his umbrella.
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